No, I didn't eat too much sugar

When my sister, Raiva, got diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes, I was 10 years old.

I remember running around yelling, “It should have been me.”

Looking back, I obviously had no idea what I was talking about. I was 10. I thought diabetes was about sugar, so I somehow thought that if one of us had to have it, it should have been me.

A year later, I was diagnosed too.

I was 11, and it was the middle of COVID. My diagnosis was actually very different from what most people probably imagine.

When Raiva was diagnosed, I tried to stay with her through the whole process. I watched her learn everything and saw what she had to go through. So when it was my turn, we already knew what was happening.

I remember having to pack my bag, but I only had to stay for a couple of hours. We already knew the whole process. We didn't need to stay in the hospital for days because Raiva had already gone through it before me.

And honestly, having her there made everything so much easier.

She had already taught me so much about diabetes before I even had it myself. I knew what the shots were. I knew about blood sugar checks. I knew about insulin. I knew that there was a lot more to it than what people think.

But knowing about diabetes and actually having diabetes are two completely different things.

I think one of the biggest things I have learned is that people really don't understand Type 1 diabetes.

Even after I tell someone that Type 1 and Type 2 diabetes are different, people still seem to think diabetes is just about sugar.

It's not.

Yes, food and carbohydrates are a huge part of managing diabetes. But I can't just stop eating sugar and suddenly not have diabetes anymore.

I have to think about my blood sugar all the time.

Shots. Blood glucose checks. Lantus. Ketone tests. A1C appointments. Carbohydrates. Figuring out how different foods affect me.

It is 24/7.

And I don't think people always realize how draining that can be.

There is a mental side to diabetes that people don't see. You can look completely fine while your brain is constantly thinking about something that everyone else gets to forget about.

Sometimes I feel like I know my way around the hospital.

And that is not a privilege.

Being diagnosed during COVID was also weird. I had just switched to a new school and was actually going to school in person, but everything was still in the middle of COVID. Everything felt normal and not normal at the same time.

There is also still a lot I don't know about my own diagnosis. My doctors are looking into whether COVID could have played a role in it, and I am still figuring out what that could mean for me.

Another thing I don't think about until it happens is how noticeable diabetes can be to other people.

I have my Dexcom on my arm, and people will randomly come up to me and ask what it is.

Sometimes I don't mind explaining it. Other times I just think, how do you even explain your entire medical condition to someone who asked because they saw something on your arm?

I have gotten pretty used to it at this point.

Having both celiac disease and Type 1 diabetes has also played a huge role in why I became interested in nutrition.

At first, I thought having diabetes meant I just had to watch what I ate. And, yes, food is an important part of managing diabetes. But I eventually realized that nutrition is so much more complicated than that.

I can't just not eat something because it has carbohydrates.

I have to learn how to understand food, account for it, and figure out what works for me.

I think that is part of why nutrition became something I actually wanted to learn more about instead of something I just had to deal with.

Diabetes has also taught me how to advocate for myself.

I have always been a pretty shy person, so speaking up for myself doesn't always come naturally to me. But with diabetes, sometimes I don't really have a choice.

At school, I have to explain what I need to my teachers. I have to advocate for myself when it comes to my diabetes. Even something as simple as keeping my phone with me can turn into a conversation.

My phone is something I need to have with me, but half the time people don't believe me when I explain why.

Even though it is literally on my 504 plan.

So I have to explain it.

Again.

And again.

I think having both celiac disease and diabetes has forced me to become more comfortable speaking up, even when I don't really want to.

I still get nervous. I am still shy. I still don't always know what to say.

But I have learned that advocating for yourself doesn't mean you aren't shy. Sometimes it just means you know that you have to speak up anyway.

When I was 10, I thought diabetes was about sugar.

Now, I know it is so much more than that.

It is something I live with every single day. It has changed how I think about food, health, nutrition, and even myself.

And honestly, I don't think I would be as interested in nutrition or as comfortable advocating for myself without it.